September 19, 2014

DeShawn Stevenson’s Tattoos Prevent Him From Using Facebook, Or Something

DeShawn Stevenson‘s NBA career has been full of very strange life events — even for an NBA player, being convicted of statutory rape is unusual and dismaying, while getting a portrait of Abe Lincoln tattooed on his neck was unusual and befuddling. And starting a feud with LeBron James while claiming Soulja Boy as an ally is downright bizarre.

But nothing to this point tops what Stevenson told reporters on Saturday: he doesn’t use Facebook, he says, because he has tattooes. Or something.

That’s the logical conclusion one draws from Stevenson telling reporters why he’s not on Facebook in the wake of a “Stevenson” on Facebook blasting James with the message, “I told em Lebron is Overrated but did they listen? swag.” Via ESPN Dallas:

“There’s like 37 people that are acting like me on Facebook,” Stevenson said. “I mean, if you look at me and look at all these tattoos, do you think I’d be sitting on the Internet and typing? C’mon, man. Sometimes you’ve got to look at a person. I would not be in my house on a computer typing nothing about anybody.”

I guess tattooes are now a defense against cyber-bullying? Anyway, beyond that head-scratching explanation of who Stevenson is, Orlando Pinstriped Post’s Evan Dunlap thinks Stevenson might not be on Facebook (or Twitter) because of that one time he flashed his credit card on MySpace while using slang terms for cocaine.

Frankly, that sounds more like the sort of thing I would associate with Stevenson’s copious ink than an aversion to social media. And, to his credit, Stevenson added, “I can’t get on there because I would say something reckless. That’s why I don’t have nothing on there. That’s why really I can’t have one.”

But citing the reason behind the tats rather than the tats themselves would have cleared up a few things.

But what do I know? I closed my MySpace account a while back.

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Comments

  1. Kick the tires and light the fires, problem officially svoled!

  2. Thanky Thanky for all this good inforamtoin!